He will strengthen you

Do not fear, for I am with you; 

do not be dismayed, 

for I am your God. 

I will strengthen you, 

I will help you, yes, 

I will uphold you with My righteous right hand. 

Isaiah 41:10 NKJV

Rest for caregivers

Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” 

Matthew 11:28

Do this for Christ

Remember that whatever you do for one another, you do for Christ. Whenever you serve one another, you're serving Christ. Keep this in mind whenever your servant's heart starts to wane and let it renew your efforts and strengthen you.

And the King will answer them, ‘

Truly, I say to you, 

as you did it to one of the least of these 

my brothers, 

you did it to me.’

Matthew 25:40 ESV

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Please join me this week in praying for a caregiver. They need our prayers as much (if not more) than those they are caring for. Pray for them to have strength and patience. Pray for assistance for them if you can't be there to help. If the caregiver is you, pray to your Father for help and guidance and whatever your needs may be.

I'll post daily reminders on:

twitter @7DegreesOfMe

Instagram @archadia27

Facebook group 7th Hour Prayer Power

Compassion and Grief

The last few weeks of my dad's life were probably the hardest for me. Watching this man, who had been my pillar of strength my entire life, decline physically wretched my heart. He tried so hard to continue to do things himself, not wanting us to help him, but ultimately having to relent. Even the simplest things, like holding a cup were difficult for him to do and frustrating and heartbreaking for us to watch. At that point in life, having to bear oneself to the world, completely dependant on those around you must be so difficult. I know my time will come, as does everyones.
     He went through all of it valiantly. We were able to spend several weeks with him at home and celebrate one more birthday (81st). I read the Gospel of John out loud while he slept and while we waited for the Lord to take him. He went peacefully and is now free from depression and pain. I know he's with the Lord because God gave me a sign. (Yes, I had my doubts before then because I didn't know he had accepted Jesus as his Lord and Savior). I miss him but am comforted with the knowledge that I'll see him again in Heaven.

Though God brings grief, 

he will show compassion, 

so great is his unfailing love. 

For he does not willingly bring affliction or 

grief to the children of men. 

Lamentations 3:32-33

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Please join me this week in praying for a caregiver. They need our prayers as much (if not more) than those they are caring for. Pray for them to have strength and patience. Pray for assistance for them if you can't be there to help. If the caregiver is you, pray to your Father for help and guidance and whatever your needs may be.

I'll post daily reminders on:

twitter @7DegreesOfMe

Instagram @archadia27

Facebook group 7th Hour Prayer Power

Provide for relatives

But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, 

and especially for members of his household, 

he has denied the faith and 

is worse than an unbeliever.

1 Timothy 5:8 ESV

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Please join me this week in praying for a caregiver. They need our prayers as much (if not more) than those they are caring for. Pray for them to have strength and patience. Pray for assistance for them if you can't be there to help. If the caregiver is you, pray to your Father for help and guidance and whatever your needs may be.

I'll post daily reminders on:

twitter @7DegreesOfMe

Instagram @archadia27

Facebook group 7th Hour Prayer Power

Caregiving tasks

I found these statistics at caregiver.org
They have many more if you're interested.
On average, caregivers spend:

• 13 days each month on tasks such as shopping, food preparation, housekeeping, laundry, transportation, and giving medication;
• 6 days per month on feeding, dressing, grooming, walking, bathing, and assistance toileting;
• 13 hours per month researching care services or information on disease, coordinating physician visits or managing financial matters. [Gallup-Healthways. (2011). Gallup-Healthways Well-Being Index.]
• Of family caregivers who provide complex chronic care:
• 46% perform medical and nursing tasks;
• More than 96% provide help with activities of daily living (ADLs) such as personal hygiene, dressing and undressing, getting in and out of bed, or instrumental activities of daily living (IADLs) such as taking prescribed medications, shopping for groceries, transportation, or using technology, or both. [AARP and United Health Hospital Fund. (2012). Home Alone: Family Caregivers Providing Complex Chronic Care.]
• On average, caregivers perform 1.7 of 6 ADLs, most commonly getting in and out of beds and chairs (43%). [National Alliance for Caregiving and AARP. (2015). Caregiving in the U.S.]
• On average, caregivers perform 4.2 of 7 IADLs, most commonly transportation (78%), grocery or other shopping (76%), and housework (72%). [National Alliance for Caregiving and AARP. (2015). Caregiving in the U.S.]
• 57% of caregivers report that they do not have a choice about performing clinical tasks, and that this lack of choice is self-imposed.
• 43% feel that these tasks are their personal responsibility because no one else can do it or because insurance will not pay for a professional caregiver.
• 12% report that they are pressured to perform these tasks by the care receiver.
• 8% report that they are pressured to perform these tasks by another family member. [AARP and United Health Hospital Fund. (2012). Home Alone: Family Caregivers Providing Complex Chronic Care.]
• Caregivers report holding significant decision-making authority regarding the following:
• Monitoring of the care recipient’s condition and adjusting care (66%);
• Communicating with healthcare professionals on behalf of the care recipient (63%);
• Acting as an advocate for the care recipient with care providers, community services, or government agencies (50%). [National Alliance for Caregiving and AARP. (2015). Caregiving in the U.S.]

As you can see, being a caregiver is a fulltime job, only it isn't just 8:00-5:00 Monday through Friday. It's accidents and falls and spills in the middle of the night. It's dealing with a medical emergency on a Sunday morning. It's coordinating transportation and doctor's appointments and tracking medicine and cooking and cleaning. It's exhausting and too much for one person to handle. So, if you know someone who's a caregiver, please reach out and offer them help or a reprieve, and please pray for them daily.

Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.

Now we ask you, brothers and sisters, to acknowledge those who work hard among you, who care for you in the Lord and who admonish you. Hold them in the highest regard in love because of their work. Live in peace with each other. And we urge you, brothers and sisters, warn those who are idle and disruptive, encourage the disheartened, help the weak, be patient with everyone. Make sure that nobody pays back wrong for wrong, but always strive to do what is good for each other and for everyone else.

Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.

1 Thessalonians 5:11-18 NIV

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Please join me this week in praying for a caregiver. They need our prayers as much (if not more) than those they are caring for. Pray for them to have strength and patience. Pray for assistance for them if you can't be there to help. If the caregiver is you, pray to your Father for help and guidance and whatever your needs may be.

I'll post daily reminders on:

twitter @7DegreesOfMe

Instagram @archadia27

Facebook group 7th Hour Prayer Power

To die unto one's self

My dad fell and broke his hip on December 23, 2018. He had surgery on the 24th, then a short stay in the hospital before being transported to a rehab facility. There, he went through physical and occupational therapy but spent most of his time in bed. He's always been a picky eater, but the food at the facility was horrible and so we couldn't really blame him for not eating. He got weaker and weaker. Since he wasn't showing improvement, they told us there was a possibility that the insurance company might send him home, so one day he mustered all of his strength and took several steps for the physical therapist, 38 to be exact, and we thought this would show them that he was trying so he could stay there and continue to get help.
     The facility wasn't perfect; there were only one nurse and one PCT per wing per shift which wasn't nearly enough, so my mom, brother, and I took care of my dad at least as much as the staff did while he was there. But, at least if there was an emergency, we felt confident he would be cared for. About a week after his miraculous 38 step demonstration, the insurance company deemed him well enough to go home. We appealed it but having found out about it late on a Thursday, for a scheduled discharge on a Saturday, we only had one day to try to persuade them. It didn't work. So he was sent home on a Saturday and we weren't prepared. We didn't have enough time to get set up for his return home. There was no Saturday or Sunday delivery for a portable toilet, wheelchair, or hospital bed.  Fortunately, he had a walker. The faceless, non-human, inhumane insurance company, who never saw my dad, had no idea of our situation or how ill-equipped we were to take care of my dad at home. Like so many others, we would have to figure it out for ourselves and learn from our mistakes. When my late husband was discharged from the hospital for the last time, it was kind of the same situation. We were given some companies to contact for this or that but what we really needed was training since we were taking on the roles of nurse, physical therapist, occupational therapist, bath aide, patient care tech, and transporter.
I wrote another post about caregivers and what you can do to help them last year:

Pray for a caregiver.

     The caregivers that I know of give 150% of themselves to their charge. They are showing everyone around them what it means to be an image-bearer of Christ. To die unto one's self, and give willingly to the comfort of one who can't take care of themselves is to live a Christ-like life. It is a painfully, difficult cross to bear, but one that makes a difference in the life of a loved one.

Shepherd the flock of God that is among you, exercising oversight, not under compulsion, but willingly, as God would have you; not for shameful gain, but eagerly; not domineering over those in your charge, but being examples to the flock. And when the chief Shepherd appears, you will receive the unfading crown of glory.

1 Peter 5:2-4 ESV

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Please join me this week in praying for a caregiver. They need our prayers as much (if not more) than those they are caring for. Pray for them to have strength and patience. Pray for assistance for them if you can't be there to help. If the caregiver is you, pray to your Father for help and guidance and whatever your needs may be.

I'll post daily reminders on:

twitter @7DegreesOfMe

Instagram @archadia27

Facebook group 7th Hour Prayer Power

Pray for a caregiver

It can happen in an instant. A fall, an ignored symptom, an accident. Just when you felt like every aspect of your life was finally in sync, the unexpected happens and a loved one is suddenly in need of care. You jump into action without even being asked. You freely and willingly sacrifice your time, sleep, and even feelings.

It's often a thankless job; one that can drain you both physically and mentally. There are times when you feel like your sense of self is completely lost and your identity is wrapped up solely in the life of the person you're caring for.

There aren't enough hours in the day. There aren't any sick days or vacation days. Holidays are double time without pay. You feel stressed, overwhelmed, and in some instances, like there's no end in sight. If you start to feel sorry for yourself, you feel guilty for having any feelings like that so you choke back the tears, and carry on.

I've been the caregiver and the one being cared for. It's not easy on either side of the coin, but we all get through. However, if you know a caregiver, there are things you can do to help.
 - give them a reprieve
 - drop them a note that lets them know someone sees how hard they work and that it's appreciated
 - offer to run some of the errands, or to take the person to doctors' visits
 - let them know that you're there for them if they need to vent, or a shoulder to cry on.
 - pray for them. There's a chance that they are so busy and so drained, that they don't take the time to pray for themselves. Pray that they receive strength, encouragement, hope.

Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. 

1 Peter 5:7

Honor the face of an old man

Do not rebuke an older man but encourage him as you would a father, 

younger men as brothers, 

older women as mothers, 

younger women as sisters, 

in all purity. 

1 Timothy 5:1-2 ESV

“You shall stand up before the gray head 

and honor the face of an old man, 

and you shall fear your God: I am the Lord. 

Leviticus 19:32 ESV

Retirement age

I've been told by nearly everyone I know who has retired, that it isn't what it's cracked up to be. People get bored quickly and miss the comradery of co-workers and clients. They miss having somewhere to go every day, and they miss being needed. So many people identify with their job that when that job is gone, they lose their identity and essentially, they lose themselves.

Here, in the U.S., it seems like there is no time or patience to deal with the older generations. Fifty years old is considered (even if it's just jokingly) "over the hill." When sixty-five was set as the official age of retirement, it seemed to set a standard by which to gauge a person's abilities. Once you're sixty-five, it's your time to retire, whether you want to or not; you're no longer useful in the workplace. I think it's influenced how society looks at the capabilities of anyone over sixty-five. Is it really the best fit for our seniors to be greeters at Walmart?

My parents are eighty-years-old and their faculties are still pretty sharp. It's funny (kind of)...if I'm talking to my dad, he'll tell me something that my mom said that makes him worry about her mind. If I'm talking to my mom, she'll confide in me that Dad forgot something she supposedly told him repeatedly. As far as I can see, their minds are at least as good as mine.

My final sentiment is this. Treasure the older members of your family, friends, and neighbors. Somehow find the time to visit, or call, or at least drop them a card so they know that someone is thinking about them. What I hate more than anything is people who are disrespectful, even angry, who don't help when asked all because the senior in their life is having trouble remembering things and it's frustrating. These same people will then cry and mourn and grieve when that person passes away. Don't wait until then to show you loved someone. It's meaningless after the fact.

Do not cast me off in the time of old age; forsake me not when my strength is spent.

Psalm 71:9 ESV

Honor and care for your family

“Honor your father and your mother, 

that your days may be long in the land 

that the Lord your God is giving you.

Exodus 20:12 ESV
 

But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, 

and especially for members of his household, 

he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.

1 Timothy 5:8 ESV